Values, Boundaries and Teetering Edge Goals

27Nov07

I was amped up about my class I just took on values and boundaries– I think because of the timing in which I had taken the class.  I just went through the most empowering workshop with the up and coming self-help guru James Ray, and after doing his 3-day intense release and clearing out process in Vegas, I feel better equipped to not only clarify my new values and boundaries, but to committ to them as well. 

 The thing that I realized from this class is that we truthfully can not create adequate boundaries that are to be respected when we don’t even know what are values are.  And furthermore we can’t even gain respect if we don’t identify what are values are, and truly live by them.  Our values are what guides us into an extraordinary and authentic life.  Without values we are just puppets on a string, living everyone else’s values.  But that is not authentic, that is not freedom and that certainly doesn’t lead to happiness.  Yet so many times we set our goals, clarify our desires, work toward those desires and at the end of it all we have no clue why we even really want what we want.  Many times we will find that a lot of what we think we want is not based on what we trully trully value in life but rather what we think we should have in order to get by in life– money, status, acceptance, approval,  power.  We think these are the important things that will get us our happiness.  But be serious with yourself– do you really value these things, or do you want them because someone else has led you to believe that you are nothing without them?  Question your values and live by your authentic values.  What are you worth? What are your gifts? What is meaningful to you? What would you die for?  What did you believe as a child?  These will lead you into uncovering some of your values.  Once you have set your values and believe you are worthy of them– in other words, that you are valuable– you are then going to understand your boundaries, that is what you will and won’t allow.  These make you respect-worthy because your implementing of boundaries based on your values have demanded that you be respected.

Only when you have made clear your values and boundaries can you then start thinking big.  However to even start thinking big, you need to cut your pyschic strings that have bound you to others’ judgements, criticisms and opinions which really have nothing to do with you.  Remember you are living by your values not their’s.  When you really get that, you can freely and fanatically start living those teetering edge goals– those big ideas that get you out of your comfort zone but not so far out that you can’t acheive them.  These are the big goals that are worthy of you and allow you to showcase your magnificence and uniqueness.  But you can’t get there if you are following someone else’s values and living by their set of  boundaries– what they say you should accept and not accept.  Listen to your own gut and most of all respect your authentic self.  If you don’t, then no one will, and you will constantly be chasing the elusive “right” way to live instead of the authentic way.  Get real and for goodness sake know that you deserve to be all that you came here to be! 

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